I posted a funny little comment on Facebook this afternoon that received immediate attention from several friends. “Perhaps I need some balance in life. All I do is work and write. Write and work. Maybe I should get married.”

I meant it as a funny little slice of life, being it’s Saturday and I didn’t have plans for any kind of fun activity or place to visit. I was home, alone, in my office, where I am now, writing this post. The pangs of watching the weeks pass me by as I work on the Emotobooks Revolution had organically grown to a sarcastic head, which then led to that silly little remark.

But five of the respondents in the first 30-minutes of the post were married. Each of them used words like, “insanity,” stupid,” and “hahaha” in reference to my commentary. I didn’t expect people to write any heartfelt soliloquies about the value and importance of marriage, but no one wrote anything in realm of “Good idea. You should get married,” or “Go ahead, I dig my spouse.”

Now, I was told by a married person that these remarks weren’t necessarily introspective of their own marriages, but more along the lines of jabbing me for mentioning a desire to get hitched, only to mix up the mundane. However, there was at least some introspection in their comments.

If asked point-blank, I’m sure most people would sing the praises of their husbands, wives, live-ins, or common-laws. But that’s not how one gets to the root of truth. Personal truth is found through the security of non-judgement, right? We often find truth in sarcastic quips and outright comedy, because we’re told those statements aren’t to be taken seriously. People are comforted in knowing their frustrations can be aired under the guise of humor while they’re protected from the big bad rolling pin.

But we all know the truth, don’t we? When Jane has one too many Appletinis at some shindig and then yammers about Joe’s dysfunctional jock, we all know she’s speaking from an uninhibited state. Of course, once Joe gets a few cans of Guinness in his rather pot-like gut, he’ll crack wise about Jane’s midnight farting.

It’s all cruel and frustrating, but it doesn’t have to be. If people can open up a bit, without fear of Joe’s sad wee-wee and Jane’s odor issues, there’d be no need for drunken sarcasm at the expense of loved ones.

So, with all of that said, I have two writing prompts for anyone wishing to take up the challenge.

The first is an uncensored and completely frank blog post about marriage. I will publish any well-written post, as long as it’s 100% real. It can be funny, sad, terrifying, loving, or all of the above. Whatever you want. Of course, the author will remain completely anonymous. I think it would be fascinating to read what someone honestly had to say about their relationship with the ole ball-n-chain, without any kind of repercussions.

If interested, email me here and let me know when you’ll have it done. Don’t worry, I used to be a freelance journalist and never did my editors know who I spoke with to gather information. It’s all good.

The second writing prompt is a fiction story about either a man or a woman, about a week or so before they tie the knot to their betrothed. What I had in mind is a story about a woman, who decides to visit a hooker (male or female) for one last romp as a single gal.

But! Rather than have sex, she ends up using her $300 paid hour to really vent about all that she can’t stand about the dude to whom she’s about to hand over her mind, body, soul.

Think about it. Here’s this male-hooker all oiled up and ready to go. He’s taken his third viagra of the day and is looking forward to getting this last client finished up, so he can go watch the game. Instead of a predictable session, he gets this client that has him sitting naked in a chair like a psychologist. She lists the ridiculous and funny things that drive her insane, and by the end, she’s a whole new woman.

It’s just an idea. I may end up writing something like that myself at some point, but not anytime soon.

Let’s see if anyone’s up for either of the challenges!